Wednesday, April 1, 2020
Anxiety and his Shoulder
These days have begun to feel a lot longer than they should. I’m not much of one for anxiety but it seems when I am thrown out of my groove of everyday life and how things should go I become very anxious. Needless to say, these past weeks my anxiety has been at an all time high. I’ve been crying a lot more, and sometimes when the rabbit in my mind gets to hopping, it wanders down a trail it should have never gone down. The wolves wait for it and gobble him alive if he doesn’t escape within time.
This past weekend I got to visit my boyfriend in Chattanooga. Friday evening the two of us ventured to sunset rock to watch the sunset. We had to park about a half of a mile down the road because the site is closed to the public due to the virus. We snuck past the roadblock and hopped the cobblestone wall where we joined many other carefree couples and travelers seeking distraction. We sat down, side by side. I leaned my head on his shoulder and he held my hand as we watched the sun grasp for its last glimpse of this side of the world. In that moment, head on shoulder and hand in hand, I felt at peace. It was within this moment for the first time in weeks that all the chaos of the current world was a distant memory.
Apologizes for my love letter, but I can’t think of something more fitting than a love letter for our current situation. Love conquers all, love demands human interaction and that is the very exact thing that is prohibited within this time. I believe that the end of humanity will be our loss of humanity, and it seems as though the death train has been placed on its proper tracks……. There goes my rabbit again.
When I’m with him, I am invincible. I forget the problems of my past, the chaos of the current world, and anxiety about the future is simply nonexistent because I have assurance that my future is with him.
Go find your shoulder to rest your head on.
My name is Mckenzie Lynn Carver, I am documenting from my home in rural Brownsville, Tennessee. Here are some of my sure thoughts during such a unsure time.
Tuesday, March 24, 2020
There were only two plots of land that separated my house from my grandparents house. Both of which were planted and harvested by my grandfather the past fall. The house that I grew up in was built on a plot of land that was formerly a cotton field farmed by my grandfather as well.
My grandparents live in a quaint little house just beyond the cotton and soybean fields. The house is nestled between tall pine trees and their pasture which their horses roamed freely in. When we realized that the virus was extremely contagious, my parents advised me that it would probably be best if I did not go to visit my grandparents due to my recent traveling on spring break. Also, according to the statistics, they are the most vulnerable for contracting the virus. I so desperately longed to sit on my Nana’s futon and listen to her many stories about my mom and aunts growing up, and to be enquired by her about my boyfriend, Tylar.
I gazed out my bedroom window at my grandparents house. I never thought it would come to this.
I never thought something would separate me from those precious souls, other than the cotton and soybean field.
Meet the Storyteller
McKenzie Carver is an insightful writer who has been fortunate enough to have many life experiences that cover much of the emotional spectrum. Carver is a sophomore at the University of Tennessee at Chattanooga and pursuing a degree in Communication and Spanish. McKenzie is passionate about traveling and the people she meets along her travels. For inquiries or more information, contact her at firstname.lastname@example.org.